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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 20:52 |
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Ìîñêâà Èãðàþ íà íåðâàõ. 
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>>Íó , áëåòü, Æãóíû... >>׸ ðåøèëè-òî??? >>Ñâî¸ èëè êàâåð??? >>Ñâî¸ -òî èíòåðåñíåé... >>äà è íà ðýéäèî ìîæíî çàïóñòèòü, !! >Ñâî¸-òî êîíå÷íî ëó÷øå. Ïîêà òóò âñå ðàçãîâàðèâàþò íà ñâîáîäíûå òåìû, ìû óæå ñêîðî ïåíþ ñäåëàåì >Äà, êñòèòè, ïîäðàáîòàë òóò íåìíîãî ìèíóñîê. Ïîñëóøàé. ×òî òî äàëüøå íå ïðèäóìûâàåòñÿ, èäåé íåò... .......................... Ñ÷àñ ïîñëóõàþ... ß, ñåãîäíÿ ïî-äîðîãå ïðîäóìàë âòîðîé êóïëåò è ñîáñíî ïðèïåâ... íó òàì ðàçäîëüå äëÿ Äåìîêðàòû÷à íà ôîíå õîðîâîãî âîêàëà...  |
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Ìû - óæå áëèçêî...
Îñòàëîñü íåñêîëüêî ïàðñåê... |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 22:12 |
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Ìîñêâà Ovation, Spector, Musicman, Genelec, Fractal 
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Ëó÷øå ñâîå íàäî. Pashedoo è Îëåã ñäåëàëè íåïëîõîé çàäåë. Îñòàëîñü íàïèñàòü íîðìàëüíûé òåêñò. Àðàíæèðîâêó è ñâåäåíèå ÿ ìîãó âçÿòü íà ñåáÿ - ïàôîñ áóäåò |
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Òîëüêî âçÿë áîåö ãèòàðó, ñðàçó âèäíî - ãàðìîíèñò!
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 22:36 |
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► Ñàíêò-Ïåòåðáóðã ► ♪♫ ♪♫ ♪♫ 
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>Pashedoo è Îëåã ñäåëàëè íåïëîõîé çàäåë. Îñòàëîñü íàïèñàòü íîðìàëüíûé òåêñò. Àðàíæèðîâêó è ñâåäåíèå ÿ ìîãó âçÿòü íà ñåáÿ - ïàôîñ áóäåò Îòëè÷íî. Çíà÷èò ðåøåíî, äåëàåì ñâî¸!  |
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ÿ ñëåæó çà òîáîé
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 22:47 |
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Íó è ãäå ïðèïåâ? Äî- ëÿ-ôà-ñîëü - ïèïåö êàê îðèãèíàëüíî  |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 22:48 |
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À Spread your wings - óäà÷íûé âûáîð, ÿ â îáîéìå. |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 22:49 |
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► Ñàíêò-Ïåòåðáóðã ► ♪♫ ♪♫ ♪♫
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>Äî- ëÿ-ôà-ñîëü - ïèïåö êàê îðèãèíàëüíî Ýòî ïðèìåð. Íó îí õîòÿ áû ñäâèíóë ñ ìåñòà ýòó áåñïîëåçíóþ áîëòîëîãèþ |
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ÿ ñëåæó çà òîáîé
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 29.09.2008 22:51 |
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► Ñàíêò-Ïåòåðáóðã ► ♪♫ ♪♫ ♪♫
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>À Spread your wings - óäà÷íûé âûáîð, ÿ â îáîéìå. Ðåøèëè äåëàòü ñâîé òðåê |
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ÿ ñëåæó çà òîáîé
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 00:03 |
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vocal
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Ñîëîìîíîâî ðåøåíèå - çàïóñêàåì íåñêîëüêî ïðîåêòîâ ïîåì âñå |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:00 |
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Äàåøü ÏÎÏÓÐÐÈ!!!!!!!!!!!  |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:04 |
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Ãîðîä ïîä îáëàêàìè... Ìîå òåëî... 
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>Äàåøü ÏÎÏÓ  |
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Ìîÿ âîêàëüíàÿ äåìî íàðåçêà â ðàçíûõ ñòèëÿõ https://yadi.sk/d/JaQmgTi5acxEG
Óøåë ñ ôîðóìà "âîêàëèñòîâ" |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:08 |
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vocal
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>Äàåøü ÏÎÏÓÐÐÈ!!!!!!!!!!! Ùà áëåòü, ÁÀÌ òîëëüêî äîñòðîèì |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:13 |
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"Âàâ âýé òèêåò" - êëàññíàÿ ïåñíÿ. Èðàáøí!!!!! |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:16 |
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vocal
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>"Âàâ âýé òèêåò" ÂàÍ |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:16 |
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Îáðó÷àëüíîå êîëüöî, Òðàâà ó äîìà, Êàñêàäåðû-êàñêàäåðû.....ìëÿ, ñêîëüêî ïåñåí êëàññíûõ. |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:18 |
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Ãîðîä ïîä îáëàêàìè... Ìîå òåëî...
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ÉàáëÀãÅ íà ÑÍÅÃÓÓÓÓ  |
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Ìîÿ âîêàëüíàÿ äåìî íàðåçêà â ðàçíûõ ñòèëÿõ https://yadi.sk/d/JaQmgTi5acxEG
Óøåë ñ ôîðóìà "âîêàëèñòîâ" |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:20 |
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Ìîñêâà Ovation, Spector, Musicman, Genelec, Fractal
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>Òðàâà ó äîìà ìàëàäåæ àáõèõèêàåò |
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Òîëüêî âçÿë áîåö ãèòàðó, ñðàçó âèäíî - ãàðìîíèñò!
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:22 |
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vocal
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À êàê æå Âëàäèìèðñêèé Öåíòðàë? |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:43 |
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>ÉàáëÎãÅ íà ÑÍÅÃÓÓÓÓ - Ìåõîèë Ìóðàìàô |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 01:45 |
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>À êàê æå Âëàäèìèðñêèé Öåíòðàë? Êñòàòè, òî÷íî. Ìèõàèë Êðóê. Öàðñòâèå åìó...... |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 07:41 |
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>âîò îò ìåíÿ íàáðîñîê áóäóùåé ïåñíè... ×èñòàÿ Ýíåðãèÿ, ñèìïàòè÷íûé íàïåâ ïîëó÷èëñÿ ó òåáÿ.  ìèíóñå âðîäå íå óñëûøàë, íî ó òåáÿ íà 0:19 ïðîñêî÷èëî ÷òî-òî çíàêîìîå - ïîòîì ïîíÿë, ÷òî íàïîìíèëî âîò ýòî: Ìîæåò è íåêðèòè÷íî, íî âäðóã.  >ñèëüíî íå ðæàòü!!! Êñòàòè î ïîðæàòü. Ùàñ áîëåå âíèìàòåëüíî ïðîñëóøàë òâîé íàáðîñîê - çäîðîâñêèé áèòáîêñ ïîëó÷èëñÿ, îñîáåííî â êîíöå, ïðèìåðíî ñ 0:40. Ñòîëüêî ýêñïðåññèè!  òó-ïóì-òó-áàö... òñ-òñ... òó-ïóì-òó-áàö-áàö-áàö-áàö...  |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 14:31 |
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Íåâèííîìûññê Jackson, SHURE SM58/57 
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Ïî òåìå áåç ëèøíèõ ïîñòîâ ) |
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Åìàíàðîò, ýòî ó òÿ ãèòàðà ÷åðåç ðàçåòêÓ!? (ñ) Êàêàÿ òî ìàäàì.
______________________________ Jackson -> Yerasov Boggart V30 |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 14:45 |
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Ìîñêâà Âåíñêèé Ñèìôîíè÷åñêèé, Êëàâà, Ñòðóíû, Ñâÿçêè ( òîæå Áðóíàí-Äæè) 
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ìëèí... äîãîâîðèëèñü óæå äî ÷åãî íèòü? |
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Ìàíèÿ âåëè÷èÿ, Ãàëþöèîíàöèè, Íåêîíòðîëèðóåìûå âñïûøêè ýìîöèé...
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 15:24 |
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>ìëèí... äîãîâîðèëèñü óæå äî ÷åãî íèòü? âðîäå êàê íåò )) |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 15:25 |
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Àëåêñåé
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"Çàìûêàÿ êðóã" ïîïðîáóéòå. Êàê-ðàç äëÿ êîëëåêòèâíîãî èñïîëíåíèÿ. |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 15:30 |
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vocal
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>âðîäå êàê íåò )) ýòî íàäîëãî. âåðíåå, äî ìîìåíòà, ïîêà êòî-ëèáî íå âîçüìåò íà ñåáÿ âåñü ãåìîðîé ñ îðãàíèçàöèåé, ñâåäåíèåì è ïðî÷èì |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 17:30 |
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spb.ru I am the Law (c) 
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ÁËÅÒÜ!!! Queen - Don't Stop me Now! |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 18:45 |
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Ìîñêâà Âåíñêèé Ñèìôîíè÷åñêèé, Êëàâà, Ñòðóíû, Ñâÿçêè ( òîæå Áðóíàí-Äæè)
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¸¸¸¸êðñòòòò... òòòò... äàâàéòå âñ¸ æ... óæå... äàâíî ïàðà... íàçëåëî... ñâîþ ïåñåíêó íàïèøåì... âîïðîñ î ÷¸ì? âîïðîñ êàêîé ãóìàíèòàðèé (ìåäëÿê, áàëëàäíûé ìåäëÿê, õèòÿðà, õàðä, èëè ÷òî òî èç÷î) ïîýòîâ êóäà âîïëîçàäü... êàìïàçèòîðîâ è àðàæèðîâùèêîâ òîæå êó÷à... ñòàâëþ íà ãîëîñîâàíèå... êòî çà ñîáñòâåííûé ôîðóìñêèé õèò? âûðàæàéòåñü - äà, íåò... |
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Ìàíèÿ âåëè÷èÿ, Ãàëþöèîíàöèè, Íåêîíòðîëèðóåìûå âñïûøêè ýìîöèé...
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 19:38 |
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×àðëè, òû êàê áóä-òî âïåðâûå çàìóæåì. Åñëè òåìà íå ñäîõíåò, òî ÷òî-íèáóäü íàðèñóåòñÿ ñòðàíèöå ýäàê íà äâàäöàòîé |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 19:41 |
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Ìîñêâà Âåíñêèé Ñèìôîíè÷åñêèé, Êëàâà, Ñòðóíû, Ñâÿçêè ( òîæå Áðóíàí-Äæè)
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>×àðëè, òû êàê áóä-òî âïåðâûå çàìóæåì. Åñëè òåìà íå ñäîõíåò, òî ÷òî-íèáóäü íàðèñóåòñÿ ñòðàíèöå ýäàê íà äâàäöàòîé  |
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Ìàíèÿ âåëè÷èÿ, Ãàëþöèîíàöèè, Íåêîíòðîëèðóåìûå âñïûøêè ýìîöèé...
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 20:13 |
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ëèáî íà 13 èëè 21 |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 20:46 |
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Ãîðîä ïîä îáëàêàìè... Ìîå òåëî...
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ß âîò êàê áû ïðîäóáëèðóþ ÷òî ëè À âû ïðåäñòàâüòå ñåáå, âêëþ÷èòå âîîáðàæåíèå è ïîéìåòå ÷òî ýòî ëó÷øèé âûáîð íà äàííûé ìîìåíò,â òîì ÷èñëå è ïî êîë-âó ó÷àñòíèêîâ. --------------------Spread You Wing--------------- 1 ÷åë Sammy was low, just watching the show, over and over again. 2 ÷åë He knew it was time, he'd made up his mind, to leave his dead life behind. 3 ÷åë His boss said to him boy, you'd better begin to get those crazy notions right out of your head 4 ÷åë Sammy who do you think that you are? You should have been sweeping, at the emerald bar. âñå âìåñòå spread your wings and fly away, fly away, far away. Spread your little wings and fly away fly away, far away. 5 ÷åë Pull yourself together, 'cause you know you should do better, that's because you're a free man. 6 ÷åë He spends his evenings alone, in his hotelroom. Keeping his thoughts to himself, he'd be leaving soon. 7 ÷åë Wishing he was miles and miles away, nothing in this world, nothing, would make him stay. 8 ÷åë Since he was small, had no luck at all, nothing came easy to him. 9 ÷åë Now it was time, he'd made up his mind, this could be my last change 10 ÷åë His boss said to him now listen boy, you're always dreaming, you got no real ambition, you won't get worried for. 11 ÷åë Sammy, boy don't you know who you are? why can't you be happy, at the emerald bar? âñå âìåñòå (So honey) spread you wings and fly away, fly away, far away. spread your little wings and fly away, fly away, far away. 12 ÷åë pull yourself together, 'cause you know you should do better, that's because your a free man. come on honey (fly with me)... Èòîãî 12 ÷åëîâåê. |
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Ìîÿ âîêàëüíàÿ äåìî íàðåçêà â ðàçíûõ ñòèëÿõ https://yadi.sk/d/JaQmgTi5acxEG
Óøåë ñ ôîðóìà "âîêàëèñòîâ" |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 21:39 |
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À ÿ âîò ÷òî ïðåäëàãàþ. Äàâàéòå ïðî÷èòàåì ïîýìó "Áîðîäèíî", êàæäûé ïî îäíîé ñòðîôå è ìóçîí íàõ íå íóæåí. |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 21:45 |
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Ìîñêâà Ovation, Spector, Musicman, Genelec, Fractal
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>À ÿ âîò ÷òî ïðåäëàãàþ. Äàâàéòå ïðî÷èòàåì ïîýìó "Áîðîäèíî", êàæäûé ïî îäíîé ñòðîôå è ìóçîí íàõ íå íóæåí. êàê ýòî íå íóæåí? íàéäåì áèòáîêñåðà è áóäåò ðàëüíî íåðåàëüíûé ðýï |
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Òîëüêî âçÿë áîåö ãèòàðó, ñðàçó âèäíî - ãàðìîíèñò!
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 22:25 |
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äåðåâíÿ Äåðåâÿííûé Ìîñò áðÿêè, êðèêè 
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>>Íó , áëåòü, Æãóíû... >>׸ ðåøèëè-òî??? >>Ñâî¸ èëè êàâåð??? >>Ñâî¸ -òî èíòåðåñíåé... >>äà è íà ðýéäèî ìîæíî çàïóñòèòü, !! >Ñâî¸-òî êîíå÷íî ëó÷øå. Ïîêà òóò âñå ðàçãîâàðèâàþò íà ñâîáîäíûå òåìû, ìû óæå ñêîðî ïåíþ ñäåëàåì >Äà, êñòèòè, ïîäðàáîòàë òóò íåìíîãî ìèíóñîê. Ïîñëóøàé. ×òî òî äàëüøå íå ïðèäóìûâàåòñÿ, èäåé íåò... ß òóò òåêñòà íàáðîñàë äâà êóïëåòà è ïðèïåâ. (ïîïñîâåíüêî âåñåëåíüêî) ß õî÷ó âçëåòåòú äî íåáà Âìåñòå ñ ïòèöàìè ïàðèòü  ñòðàíû, ãäå åùå ÿ íå áûë ß õî÷ó ïî ìîðþ ïëûòü ß õî÷ó óâèäåòú çâåçäû Íî íå íî÷üþ, à âáëèçè  ïûëüíîé êíèãå ñêóøíîé ïðîçû Ñâåò ïîýçèè íàéòè Ïðèïåâ  ìèèèèèèð ìååååå÷òûû,  ìèð ìîåé âîëøåáíîé ìå÷òû ßÿÿÿÿÿ èèèè òûûûûûû Óëåòèì ñêîðåé îñþäà Óëåòèì òóäà ãäå ÷óäî  ìè-èð ìå÷òû Åñëè ÎÊ, ïðèïåâ ïîòîì íàïîþ è çàïîùó. |
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“We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief
requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about.” Einstein |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 22:46 |
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Æåñòÿíùèê - ïîðûâ äóøè äåëî ïîõâàëüíîå, íî ÷åò êàê-òî íàèâíåíüêî. Ïðî ñâåò ïîýçèè íè÷å òàê.... à âîò çâåçäû âáëèçè - íå î÷åíü |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 23:34 |
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spb.ru I am the Law (c)
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Ïîñëóøàë ñïðýä éî âèíãñ. Ñëîæíàÿ õîðîøàÿ ïåñíÿ. Âîîáùå êîíå÷íî Êâèí - øèêàðíûé ðåïåðòóàð... ëþáóþ ïåñíþ áåðè è ïîé. È áëàãî ìèíóñà åñòü. |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 30.09.2008 23:47 |
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äåðåâíÿ Äåðåâÿííûé Ìîñò áðÿêè, êðèêè
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> Æåñòÿíùèê - ïîðûâ äóøè äåëî ïîõâàëüíîå, íî ÷åò êàê-òî íàèâíåíüêî. Ïðî ñâåò ïîýçèè íè÷å òàê.... à âîò çâåçäû âáëèçè - íå î÷åíü ÎÊ. Ðåçîííî. Âáëèçè çàìåíèë ß æå ñêàçàë - ïîïñîâåíüêî-âåñåëåíüêî. Ìåëîäèÿ âåäü òîæå - íå Ðàõìàíèíîâ. Åñëè íàðîä ñêàæåò äîáàâèòü ôèëîñîôèè, òî ìîæíî è äîáàâèòü. Ïîêà ïðîäîëæàþ ñåé íàèâíûé êðåàòèâú ß õî÷ó âçëåòåòú äî íåáà Âìåñòå ñ ïòèöàìè ïàðèòü  ñòðàíû ãäå åùå ÿ íå áûë ß õî÷ó ïî ìîðþ ïëûòü Ïðèêîñíóòüñÿ ê ÿðêèì çâåçäàì  äèñêå Ìëå÷íîãî Ïóòè  ïûëüíîé êíèãå ñêóøíîé ïðîçû Ñâåò ïîýçèè íàéòè Ïðèïåâ  ìèèèèèèð ìååååå÷òûû,  ìèð ìîåé âîëøåáíîé ìå÷òû ßÿÿÿÿÿ èèèè òûûûûûû Óëåòèì ñêîðåé îñþäà Óëåòèì òóäà ãäå ÷óäî  ìè-èð ìå÷òû Íà êðàþ çåìëè ñ çàðåþ Ïîäíèìàþ ïàðóñà Áåëîé ïåíîé çà êîðìîþ Îáëàêà è íåáåñà Ñëîâíî ñïÿùèå áèçîíû Ïðîïëûâàþò îáëàêà Ìîé êîðàáëü íåâåñîìûé Ïîä íàçâàíèåì Ìå÷òà (Ïðèïåâ) Íàø êîðàáëü íå áîèòñÿ Îñòðûõ è óãðþìûõ ñêàë Îí ñàäèòñÿ ñëîâíî ïòèöà Íà çåëåíûõ îñòðîâàõ Çàëèâàåò ñîëíöå ìîðå Çîëîòûå áåðåãà È øóìÿò ãóñòîé òðàâîþ Èçóìðóäíûå ëóãà (Ïðèïåâ) Âîîáùå ñêîëüêî êóïëåòîâ íàäî? Êñòàòè, êòî õî÷åò, ìîæåò ïîäêëþ÷àòúñÿ, âñòàâëÿòüñÿ èëè ïðîäîëæàòü. Ñåãà, äîáðî ïîæàëîâàòü. |
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“We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief
requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about.” Einstein |
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| Àâòîð |
Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 01.10.2008 00:57 |
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Òààààêñññññ, âîò õëåáîì íå êîðìè - äàé ïîêðèòèêîâàòü. Íà÷èíàåì-ñ  1. Ïëûòü ïî ìîðþ - íå êðèìèíàëüíî, íî ïî ìîðþ íåëüçÿ íè õîäèòü íè ëåòàòü, òîëüêî ïëûòü - ñòàëî áûòü "ïëûòü ïî ìîðþ" ñëèøêîì áàíàëüíî äëÿ âûñîêîé ïîýçèè. Íóæíà àëëåãîðèÿ òèïà ñêîëüçèòü...è ò.ä. 2.  äèñêå ìëå÷íîãî ïóòè.... - âîçìîæíî òàì è åñòü äèñêè, â ïîçâîíî÷íèêå âåäü îíè èìåþòñÿ , íî äëÿ ñåðîãî ñëóøàòåëÿ, êîèì ÿâëÿþñü ÿ, íà Ìëå÷íîì ïóòè íå ìîæåò áûòü äèñêà....3. Ñëîâî "áèçîíû" çâó÷èò ðåçêîâàòî, åñòü áîëåå ýëåãàíòíûå æèâîòíûå, êîíè, ëåáåäè, îëåíè..... 4.  ïåðâîé ñòðîôå äâàæäû çâó÷èò "õî÷ó" - ëèøíåå, òàâòîëîãèÿ. 5. Êîðàáëü íå áîèòñÿ - à êóëè åìó áîÿòüñÿ, îí äåðåâÿííûé  6. Óãðþìûå ñêàëû - òîæå áîëüøå ê îäóøåâëåííîìó ïðåäìåòó áû ïîäîøëî.. 7. Ñëîâíî ïòèöà ñàäèòñÿ íà çåëåíûé îñòðîâàõ - ìîæíî ñàäèòüñÿ íà çåëåíûÅ îñòðîâà, à íà çåëåíûõ îñòðîâàõ ìîæíî îòëîæèòü ÿéöà è ëåòåòü äàëüøå .8.  ïîñëåäíåé ñòðîôå - Çàëèâàåò ñîëíöå ìîðå çîëîòûå áåðåãà...ÿ òàê ïîíÿë ýòî ïåðå÷èñëåíèå, òîãäà ëó÷øå áóäåò "çàëèâàåò ñîëíöå ìîðå è çëàòûå áåðåãà", èíà÷å íå ïîíÿòíî, ÷òî ýòî ïåðå÷èñëåíèå. Íå, ÿ íå ìîãó ïèñàòü ñòèõîâ, ÿ èõ ðèôìîâàòü íå ìîãó, ðàçâå ÷òî ïàëêà-ñêàëêà, áîòèíîê - âòîðîé áîòèíîê |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 01.10.2008 01:02 |
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>íåëüçÿ íè õîäèòü íè ëåòàòü õîäèòü êñòàòè ìîæíî. >Íàø êîðàáëü íå áîèòñÿ >Îñòðûõ è óãðþìûõ ñêàë >Îí ñàäèòñÿ ñëîâíî ïòèöà >Íà çåëåíûõ îñòðîâàõ åäèíñòâåííîå ÷òî íåëåïî ) |
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Òåìà: Re: ÍÎÂÛÉ ÊÀÂÅÐ. ÈÄÅÈ, ÏÐÅÄËÎÆÅÍÈß
Âðåìÿ: 01.10.2008 01:24 |
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>>íåëüçÿ íè õîäèòü íè ëåòàòü >õîäèòü êñòàòè ìîæíî. ß ïîíèìàþ, ýòî òåáÿ â ìîðåõîäêå íàó÷èëè Òîãäà íóæíî íàçâàòü ïåñíþ "Ïåñíÿ âåñåëîãî ìîðåõîäà". |
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