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Ôîðóì òåêñòîâèêîâ

Çàäàòü íîâóþ òåìó
Àâòîð Òåìà: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 10:19 



Âñåì ïðèâåò!

Çàíåñëî ìåíÿ ñþäà ñ âîêàëüíîãî... Êîðî÷å, äåëàåì ñ îäíîé ïîëüñêîé ãðóïïîé äåìî-àëüáîì. Ìíå âûïàëà íåëåãêàÿ äîëÿ íàïèñàíèÿ òåêñòà, à â ýòîì ÿ ïðàêòè÷åñêè ëîïóõ. Ïîýòîìó ïðåæäå ÷åì îïîçîðèòüñÿ (à ëó÷øå, ×ÒÎÁÛ ÍÅ îïîçîðèòüñÿ), õîòåëîñü áû ïîëó÷èòü êðèòèêè è çàìå÷àíèé ïî ïîëíîé ïðîãðàììå! Çàðàíåå ñïàñèáî :)

Âîò òåêñò:

The dark riders

Riding through the darkness
Ready to attack
Destruction, death and madness
It’s time to give it back

Demons are inside us
Creeping through our veins
We’ve lost our souls and feelings
Just hungry for revenge

The dark riders – mystery madmen
The dark riders – furious demons
The dark riders – defenders of freedom
So who we are?

Chasing after bad guys
Never giving in
Forgotten all our prayers
Can’t keep the anger in

Pulling triggers quickly
There’s no time to waste
We see them falling slowly
Their eyes are full of hate

The dark riders – mystery madmen
The dark riders – furious demons
The dark riders – defenders of freedom
So who we are?
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 10:38 
Âëàäèìèðñêàÿ Ðóñ


Äëÿ "ëîïóõà" - êðàéíå íåïëîõî ))))
Õîòÿ îáðàç ìûøëåíèÿ - ÷èñòî ðóññêèé ))))
"ÿ àëëåêà ëþáëþ... ïðàâèòü" (Ñ)
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 11:01 



>Õîòÿ îáðàç ìûøëåíèÿ - ÷èñòî ðóññêèé ))))

Àãà :) äàæå ÿ áåç ñëîâàðÿ ïåðåâåë
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 11:06 
Âëàäèìèðñêàÿ Ðóñ


 èäåàëå òåêñò íàäî äëÿ òàêèõ ñëó÷àåâ çàêàçûâàòü ó íîñèòåëåé ÿçûêà. Èëè ó Proximus'a. Âîò îí ðåàëüíî ïî-àíãëèéñêè ìûñëèò.
"ÿ àëëåêà ëþáëþ... ïðàâèòü" (Ñ)
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 16:48 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Ñïàñèáî. Äà, ÿ ñîãëàñåí, ÷òî õîä ìûñëåé ÷èñòî ðóññêèé. Ïðîñòî îïûòà ó ìåíÿ 0 â ýòîì. Õîòÿ àíãëèéñêèé èñïîëüçóþ äàâíî, ïèøó íà íåì íàó÷íûå ñòàòüè ïðàêòè÷åñêè áåç êîñÿêîâ. Íî ýòî, ìÿãêî ãîâîðÿ, ñîâñåì èíîå.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 22:12 



We lost our souls - past simple

mysterious madmen

Forgotten all our prayers - Íå çíàêîì ñ òàêîé ôîðìîé. Have forgotten èëè forgot.

PS: Òåêñò íè÷åì íå óñòóïàåò âîêàëó. :lol:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 22:19 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

>We lost our souls - past simple
 ïðèíöèïå, ñîãëàñåí. Òàê è ïåòü ïðîùå áóäåò.

>mysterious madmen
Iron Maiden, Only the good die young (íà÷àëî êóïëåòà 2, òî æå ñëîâîñî÷åòàíèå).

>Forgotten all our prayers - Íå çíàêîì ñ òàêîé ôîðìîé. Have forgotten èëè forgot.
Åñòåñòâåííî, perfect, ïðîñòî íåêóäà have âñòàâèòü.

>PS: Òåêñò íè÷åì íå óñòóïàåò âîêàëó.
Ñàìîìíåíèå íà òîì æå çàïðåäåëüíîì óðîâíå, êàê è íà âîêàëüíîì. :idea2:
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.10.2012 22:23 



>>We lost our souls - past simple
>Â ïðèíöèïå, ñîãëàñåí. Òàê è ïåòü ïðîùå áóäåò.

Òû ìíå äåëàåøü îäîëæåíèå èëè àíãëèéñêîìó ÿçûêó? Íàó÷íûå ñòàòüè îí ïèøåò. :degenerat:

>>mysterious madmen
>Iron Maiden, Only the good die young (íà÷àëî êóïëåòà 2, òî æå ñëîâîñî÷åòàíèå).

Ïîçäðàâëÿþ. :idea2:

>>Forgotten all our prayers - Íå çíàêîì ñ òàêîé ôîðìîé. Have forgotten èëè forgot.
>Åñòåñòâåííî, perfect, ïðîñòî íåêóäà have âñòàâèòü.

Ãåíèàëüíî. :lol:

- Äîðîãîé, ïî÷åìó ó êðîâàòè òðè íîæêè?
- À ÷åòâåðòóþ íåêóäà áûëî âñòàâëÿòü. :lool:

>>PS: Òåêñò íè÷åì íå óñòóïàåò âîêàëó.
>Ñàìîìíåíèå íà òîì æå çàïðåäåëüíîì óðîâíå, êàê è íà âîêàëüíîì.

Ìîãó ñåáå ýòî ïîçâîëèòü, ìîé ìàëü÷èê. :hb:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 00:14 
Ëåíèíãðàä
àê. ãèò.

Òàê íà àíãëèéñêîì òåêñò íèêòî è íå ïîêðèòèêîâàë! ####!
Îí ñëîâî ïðîâåðèë íà ïðî÷íîñòü è âåñ...(ñ)
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 00:26 



>Òàê íà àíãëèéñêîì òåêñò íèêòî è íå ïîêðèòèêîâàë! ####!

À ÷òî òóò êðèòèêîâàòü? ßñåëüíûå êàðàêóëè? :drumtalk:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 00:29 
Ï-ñê


>àê íà àíãëèéñêîì òåêñò íèêòî è íå ïîêðèòèêîâàë!

Äûñ èç äý âýðè-âýðè õàðä.. áèêîç íèêòî èç íåàíäåñòýíäèë àëë îô èò ìûñëüñ.. 8-(

8-)
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 10:04 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

>>Ñàìîìíåíèå íà òîì æå çàïðåäåëüíîì óðîâíå, êàê è íà âîêàëüíîì.
>Ìîãó ñåáå ýòî ïîçâîëèòü, ìîé ìàëü÷èê.
Íó äà, êîðîëåâñêîìó øóòó ìîæíî ãîâîðèòü âñ¸, ÷òî óãîäíî.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 10:09 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Åù¸ êàêèå-íèáóäü êîñÿêè åñòü?
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 10:27 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

 îáùåì, çàïîñòèë òåêñò åù¸ íà àêàïåëëó. Ïîñìîòðèì, ÷òî òàì ñêàæóò íîñèòåëè.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.10.2012 23:13 



Ïåðâûå äâå ñòðîêè - äðàéâ è êðàñîòà, äàëüøå ïîøëè íåïîíÿòêè.
ðèôìà attack - back íå î÷åíü (â ïåðâîì ñëó÷àå òàì áîëüøå ðóññêîå "à", âî âòîðîì - ðóññêîå "ý".) Íó à darkness-madness òàê è âîâñå íå ðèôìà.

Îòñóòñòâóåò ïîäëåæàùåå è ñêàçóåìîå. Êòî ÷åãî?
Âîò ñðàâíè ìîþ ðåäàêòîðñêóþ "ïðàâêó", ãäå åñòü ñóáúåêò, îáúåêò, åãî àòðèáóòû è àêöèÿ:

Riding through the madness
Eager for the luck
Dark unholy maidens
Force me to attack

"Ñêà÷óùèå ñêâîçü áåçóìèå, æàæäóùèå óäà÷è ò¸ìíûå íå÷èñòûå äåâû çàñòàâëÿþò ìåíÿ àòàêîâàòü". Ñìûñëîâîå íàïîëíåíèå íå îáñóæäàåì, îäíàêî âèäèì, ÷òî ïîÿâèëèñü âñå ãðàììàòè÷åñêèå "ïðàâèëüíîñòè". Âîïðîñ îá àðòèêëÿõ, âïðî÷åì, îòêðûò.

Äàëüøå ÿ ÷èòàë, íî îãðàíè÷óñü òîëüêî 1 êóïëåòîì.
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 31.10.2012 00:54 



Åùå îäèí. Íå, ÿ êóåþ îò Ðàñåè. :lool:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 31.10.2012 13:25 
Ëåíèíãðàä
àê. ãèò.

Îäèí bav9 , ÷òî-òî êóìåêàåò â ïîýçèè ïî-àíãëèéñêè. Îñòàëüíûå òîðìîçÿò.
Îí ñëîâî ïðîâåðèë íà ïðî÷íîñòü è âåñ...(ñ)
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 31.10.2012 14:53 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Áèã Äèê , òâîé âàðèàíò ïîëó÷øå çâó÷èò, êàê-òî "ïëàâíåå" ïîëó÷àåòñÿ.
Íà Àêàïåëëå íàðîäó íå ïîíðàâèëàñü ôðàçà "Chasing after bad guys". Ïðàâäà, ÿ íå ïîíÿë ÷åì... Îñòàëüíîå, ñêàçàëè, íîðìàëüíî. Âðîäå áû àíãëèéñêèé ó íèõ - ïåðâûé ÿçûê.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 31.10.2012 15:04 



>Åùå îäèí. Íå, ÿ êóåþ îò Ðàñåè.

Ý, èçðàèëüòÿíèí, êóåé ëó÷øå îò ñâîåãî ìîøå äàÿíà, èäè êòî òàì ó âàñ... :)

Êðèòèêóþ íà áàñóðìàíñêîì:

Àíàí ñêåé, äæàëÿá ñûê òûì. :19:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 31.10.2012 17:03 

papaver somniferum

>Ý, èçðàèëüòÿíèí, êóåé ëó÷øå îò ñâîåãî ìîøå äàÿíà, èäè êòî òàì ó âàñ...
ìîøå äàÿí+àááó ýáàí=äàÿí ýáàí :lol:
áûòü ñàìèì ñîáîé - äî ýòîãî äîäóìûâàþòñÿ íåìíîãèå, îñòàâàòüñÿ ñàìèì ñîáîé, íå èäÿ íà ïîâîäó ó áîëüøèíñòâà - íà ýòî ìàëî êòî îñìåëèâàåòñÿ..
ÿ íå äóìàþ, ÷òî ïèøó..÷òî ïèøåòñÿ-è ñëàâíî (ñ) edd old :degenerat:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 01.11.2012 00:56 

Ñåâàñòîïîëü

>ìîøå äàÿí+àááó ýáàí=äàÿí ýáàí

Âåíè÷êà :agree:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 01.11.2012 01:07 

papaver somniferum

>Âåíè÷êà :agree:
îãà :agree:
áûòü ñàìèì ñîáîé - äî ýòîãî äîäóìûâàþòñÿ íåìíîãèå, îñòàâàòüñÿ ñàìèì ñîáîé, íå èäÿ íà ïîâîäó ó áîëüøèíñòâà - íà ýòî ìàëî êòî îñìåëèâàåòñÿ..
ÿ íå äóìàþ, ÷òî ïèøó..÷òî ïèøåòñÿ-è ñëàâíî (ñ) edd old :degenerat:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 05.11.2012 11:13 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Íà çàïàäíûõ ôîðóìàõ ñêàçàëè, ÷òî òåêñò ïåñíè íîðì, íî íå ïîäõîäèò ïîä òðýø. Ïîýòîìó ÿ åãî ïåðåäåëàë ïîä äðóãóþ ïåñíþ, êîòîðàÿ óæå íå òðýø, à õýâè. Âîò ÷òî ïîëó÷èëîñü:

The dark riders

Riding through the darkness
Ready to attack
Destruction, death and madness
It’s time to give it back
Demons are inside us
Creeping through our veins

Devil’s ruling again
Longing for bloody game
If you’re ready to play
Don’t be shy, come this way

Chasing after bad guys
Never giving in
We forgot our prayers
Can’t keep the anger in
Pulling triggers quickly
There’s no time to waste

Devil’s ruling again
Longing for bloody game
If you’re ready to play
Don’t be shy, come this way

Solo

The dark riders
The dark riders

Ïðèìèòèâ, êîíå÷íî, íî íà êîíöåðòå ïðîêà÷àåò :super:
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 07.11.2012 13:31 
Ìîñêâà
Warwick DE

Àâòîð, íó òû ïèøè òàì... íå çàáûâàé :)
E-mail: vovanmetal@hotmail.com
ICQ 376805505
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 08.11.2012 23:01 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

À ÷òî ïèñàòü-òî? Âñ¸, òåêñò ïðèíÿò â îêîí÷àòåëüíîé ðåäàêöèè! Ñïàñèáî âñåì çà îáñóæäåíèå, îòäåëüíîå ñïàñèáî Èçå Øíèïåðñîíó çà ïàðó öåííûõ ñîâåòîâ :idea2:
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 08.11.2012 23:48 



>Òàê íà àíãëèéñêîì òåêñò íèêòî è íå ïîêðèòèêîâàë! ####!

ß äóìàë ýòî ïîëüñêèé... :upset:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 09.11.2012 00:43 



>>Òàê íà àíãëèéñêîì òåêñò íèêòî è íå ïîêðèòèêîâàë! ####!
>ß äóìàë ýòî ïîëüñêèé...

:tardlol:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 09.11.2012 13:04 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

>ß äóìàë ýòî ïîëüñêèé...
Òû äóìàòü óìååøü? Êðóòîé ìýí :idea2:
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 28.11.2012 22:33 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Òåìå up :idea2:

Âòîðàÿ ïåñíÿ ãðóïïû Starburst íà ïîäõîäå. Òåêñò îïÿòü ìíå ïðèøëîñü ñî÷èíÿòü... Êðèòèêóåì, ãîòîâèì êàêàøêè. Èçÿ, íå ñïè :)

Into the abyss

Intro
We gotta get ready for a long voyage…

Solo 1

Verse 1

Sailing faster and
Diving deeper ‘cause
There’s no place for us on the ground
Came black warriors
Devil’s messengers
Piercing laser eyes all around

Chorus

Heading for the abyss…

Verse 2

Hundreds miles away
So we made the way
Still we’re heading for the unknown
Sailing on and on
Through the tides and storms
‘Cross the blackened sea all alone

Chorus

Bridge

Heading for the abyss
Ain’t got no place to hide




Solo 2

Verse 3

Diving on and on
Reached the deepest place
Gotta hide ourselves to survive
We’ll make up our minds
And take up new arms
And some day our hopes will revive

Chorus
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 01:40 



à ëó÷øå, ÷åì ïåðâûé òåêñò. äàëüøå îò "ðóññêîãî ìûøëåíèÿ" (ñ)

Came black warriors - ôèãîâîå ïîñòðîåíèå

âîîáùå, îñíîâíàÿ îòðèöàòåëüí ôèøêà - êàê áû ñêàçàòü.. âîò âîçüìè ñâîé òåêñò è òåêñò ïåñíè "íîñèòåëåé": òâîé - ãîðàçäî ïîíÿòíåå íå-íîñèòåëþ, ñîãëàñèñü?
ýòî íå òî ÷òî áû ÿâíûé ìèíóñ, íî ðàçíèöà.
õîòÿ è ó íîñèòåëåé ñëó÷àþòñÿ î÷åíü ïîíÿòíûå òåêñòû.
ÌÀÍÒÀ. Íàäåæíûé ïðîâîäíèê â îêåàíå âàøèõ çàáëóæäåíèé
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 02:05 



manta , ìîæíî ïîèíòåðåñîâàòüñÿ, êàêîå òû èìååøü ïðåäñòàâëåíèå î íåðóññêîì ìûøëåíèè? :mat:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 02:15 



åñòåñòâåííî, ìåíüøåå, ÷åì ñàìè íîñèòåëè.
ÌÀÍÒÀ. Íàäåæíûé ïðîâîäíèê â îêåàíå âàøèõ çàáëóæäåíèé
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 02:17 



>åñòåñòâåííî, ìåíüøåå, ÷åì ñàìè íîñèòåëè.

Ñïàñèáî çà îòâåò. Íàø ñîòðóäíèê ñâÿæåòñÿ ñ âàìè â áëèæàéøåå âðåìÿ. :mat:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 02:26 



îêå)

íó à êàêîé îòâåò òû æäàë? ñîâñåì áåç ïðåäñòàâëåíèÿ ÿ âåäü íå ïîëåç áû î òàêîì ðàññóæäàòü.
ÌÀÍÒÀ. Íàäåæíûé ïðîâîäíèê â îêåàíå âàøèõ çàáëóæäåíèé
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 02:33 
Ñàíêò-Ïåòåðáóðã
Ãèòàðû ôåíäåð,á¸ðíè, ïåðåäàò÷èê, Ãëîòêà

ñîãëàñåí ñ áàâîì.. :)
ÿ êàê Àëåêñàíäðîâñêèé ñòîëï
ñòîþ è íå ïàäàþ è çà ìíîé ìîé àíãåë è êðåñò
íî íåêîòîðûå äåáèëû äóìàþò òàê
èëè ñòîëáû íå âèñÿò íà ïðîâîäàõ ýòî ïðîâîäà âèñÿò íà ñòîëáàõ
http://www.realmusic.ru/that_take
bahvik@bk.ru
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 11:07 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

>âîîáùå, îñíîâíàÿ îòðèöàòåëüí ôèøêà - êàê áû ñêàçàòü.. âîò âîçüìè ñâîé òåêñò è òåêñò ïåñíè "íîñèòåëåé": òâîé - ãîðàçäî ïîíÿòíåå íå-íîñèòåëþ, ñîãëàñèñü?
Íó ÿ òîëüêî äåëàþ ïåðâûå øàãè â ýòîì íàïðàâëåíèè. Ïîíèìàþ, î ÷åì òû ãîâîðèøü. ß ðåöåíçèðóþ ìíîãî íàó÷íûõ ñòàòåé íà àíãëèéñêîì è ñðàçó âèæó, êàêóþ íàïèñàë íîñèòåëü, à êàêóþ íåò. Õîòÿ áûâàåò, ÷òî íåíîñèòåëè î÷åíü õîðîøî ïèøóò.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 11:09 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

> Came black warriors - ôèãîâîå ïîñòðîåíèå
Íó äà, ìîæíî áûëî áû ïîèñêàòü ÷òî-òî ëó÷øå. Íî, íàñêîëüêî ÿ çíàþ (äà è âèäåë ìíîãî ðàç), ïåðåñòàâëÿòü ïîäëåæàùåå è ñêàçóåìîå â ñòèõàõ äîïóñêàåòñÿ.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 11:27 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Êñòàòè, âîò ÷òî ïîëó÷èëîñü ñ ïåðâîé ïåñíåé:



Ýòî íå î÷åíü êà÷åñòâåííûé ïðåäâàðèòåëüíûé ìèêñ, ôèíàë (êîòîðûé ïîéäåò íà ïðîäàæó) áóäåò îáðàáàòûâàòüñÿ è ñâîäèòüñÿ â ñòóäèè â Ïîëüøå.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 13:33 



Ïðÿì êîíåö 80-õ âñïîìíèëñÿ, Europa òàì è ïðî÷èå âîëîñàòûå ïàðíè.. :lol:
Äàæå áî÷êà ïî ñàóíäó - âñ¸ òà æå áåññìåííàÿ Tama
À ÷î ïîëüñêèå áðàòüÿ íå íàïèøóò òåêñò?
Îíå æå âðîäå ê àãëèöêîìó éàçûêó áëèæå..
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 13:47 



>îêå)
>íó à êàêîé îòâåò òû æäàë? ñîâñåì áåç ïðåäñòàâëåíèÿ ÿ âåäü íå ïîëåç áû î òàêîì ðàññóæäàòü.

Íåò êîíå÷íî. :ulyb:
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 17:31 
Ñàíêò-Ïåòåðáóðã
Ãèòàðû ôåíäåð,á¸ðíè, ïåðåäàò÷èê, Ãëîòêà

ñêàæè ïåâöó ÷òîáû ãëàñíûå òÿíóë êàê ìîæíî äîëüøå.. à òî ãàâêàíüå ïîëó÷àåòñÿ.
à ãèòàðèñòó õîòÿ áû â êîíöå ñîëÿãè êîíòðàïóíêòîì ïàññàæ ñäåëàòü.. :unsure:
ÿ êàê Àëåêñàíäðîâñêèé ñòîëï
ñòîþ è íå ïàäàþ è çà ìíîé ìîé àíãåë è êðåñò
íî íåêîòîðûå äåáèëû äóìàþò òàê
èëè ñòîëáû íå âèñÿò íà ïðîâîäàõ ýòî ïðîâîäà âèñÿò íà ñòîëáàõ
http://www.realmusic.ru/that_take
bahvik@bk.ru
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 20:59 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Àíäðåé , ïîëÿêè â àíãëèéñêîì íå ñèëüíû, òàê ÷òî ìíå ïðèõîäèòñÿ îòäóâàòüñÿ.
BluesMachine , êàê ïåâåö îòâå÷àþ, ÷òî â ýòîé ïåñíå ãëàñíûå íå íàäî òÿíóòü, òóò è äîëæíî áûòü "ãàâêàíüå". Íó ãèòàðèñòó ïåðåäàì...
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 22:54 
Ñàíêò-Ïåòåðáóðã
Ãèòàðû ôåíäåð,á¸ðíè, ïåðåäàò÷èê, Ãëîòêà

>ãëàñíûå íå íàäî òÿíóòü, òóò è äîëæíî áûòü "ãàâêàíüå"
ãëàñíûå ïðîïåâàòü íàäî âñåãäà.. à íå ãëîòàòü èõ..
ÿ êàê Àëåêñàíäðîâñêèé ñòîëï
ñòîþ è íå ïàäàþ è çà ìíîé ìîé àíãåë è êðåñò
íî íåêîòîðûå äåáèëû äóìàþò òàê
èëè ñòîëáû íå âèñÿò íà ïðîâîäàõ ýòî ïðîâîäà âèñÿò íà ñòîëáàõ
http://www.realmusic.ru/that_take
bahvik@bk.ru
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 29.11.2012 23:09 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

>ãëàñíûå ïðîïåâàòü íàäî âñåãäà.. à íå ãëîòàòü èõ..
Ãäå îíè ïðîãëî÷åíû?
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.11.2012 12:21 
Ìîñêâà
Squier Affinity Jazzmaster

Ìíå ÍÐÀ :appl:
Ïåðèîäè÷åñêè, âîçâðàùàåøüñÿ ê òîìó, ñ ÷åãî íà÷èíàë. ×èñòûé ëèñò, íî, ÷òî, â í¸ì áóäåò íàïèñàíî?
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.11.2012 13:32 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

Ñïàñèáî. Áóäåì ñòàðàòüñÿ.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.11.2012 14:16 



> ïîëÿêè â àíãëèéñêîì íå ñèëüíû, òàê ÷òî ìíå ïðèõîäèòñÿ îòäóâàòüñÿ.
Îê. Ïðîñòî íàñêîëüêî çíàþ àíãëîÿçû÷íàÿ àóäèòîðèÿ óãàðàåò è íå ïîíèìàåò òåêñòû íàïèñàííûå íå íîñèòåëÿìè ÿçûêà. Íî óñïåõîâ â ëþáîì ñëó÷àå!
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.11.2012 14:34 



>> ïîëÿêè â àíãëèéñêîì íå ñèëüíû, òàê ÷òî ìíå ïðèõîäèòñÿ îòäóâàòüñÿ.
>Îê. Ïðîñòî íàñêîëüêî çíàþ àíãëîÿçû÷íàÿ àóäèòîðèÿ óãàðàåò è íå ïîíèìàåò òåêñòû íàïèñàííûå íå íîñèòåëÿìè ÿçûêà. Íî óñïåõîâ â ëþáîì ñëó÷àå!

Äëÿ ýòîãî êîíñóëüòèðóþòñÿ ñ íîñèòåëÿìè ÿçûêà ïðè íàïèñàíèè òåêñòîâ, è âñå ñ÷àñòëèâû.
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 30.11.2012 15:55 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

>Îê. Ïðîñòî íàñêîëüêî çíàþ àíãëîÿçû÷íàÿ àóäèòîðèÿ óãàðàåò è íå ïîíèìàåò òåêñòû íàïèñàííûå íå íîñèòåëÿìè ÿçûêà. Íî óñïåõîâ â ëþáîì ñëó÷àå!
Ñïàñèáî. Ýòîò òåêñò îáñóæäàëñÿ íà íåñêîëüêèõ àíãëîÿçû÷íûõ ôîðóìàõ. Íèêòî ÷òî-òî íå óãàðàë. ß áûë äàæå óäèâëåí, ÷òî ìîè ïîýòè÷åñêèå ïîòóãè òàê âûñîêî îöåíèâàþò íåçíàêîìûå ëþäè, äà åù¸ è íîñèòåëè.
https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
Àâòîð
Òåìà: Re: Ïîêðèòèêóéòå òåêñò íà àãëèöêîì
Âðåìÿ: 06.12.2012 21:34 
Äèâàííûé
âîêàëèçÄ

À âîò è âòîðàÿ ïåñíÿ...

https://www.youtube.com/user/IgorJugulatorZotov - ìîé ìóçûêàëüíûé êàíàë
https://www.numberonemusic.com/theperfectbalance - îôèöèàëüíàÿ ñòðàíèöà The Perfect Balance
 ýòîò ôîðóì ìîãóò ïèñàòü òîëüêî çàðåãèñòðèðîâàííûå ïîëüçîâàòåëè!